My New Glass Box

Who needs intros? Shit went down and now I’m here.

We’re all about being weird, accepting our differences, let’s have a picnic on unicorns.

Fuck that shit. I want to be normal.

I know everyone is themselves, throughout, “the universe in their eyes” as George Carlin was saying, but I’m not talking about that part.

I’m talking about standing strong again, not living in a locked glass box looking out on the mess that’s my life that I’m itching to clean up.

What am I doing now? I’m making the glass box look nice at least.

Mindfulness helps. Being in the moment, not being chained to your thoughts. I do better when I concentrate outwards and am not inside myself, like concentrate on the environment, like the cat.

Yoga. Though hell, that does nothing to scratch that angry itch I’ve got. I want to get back into rugby, dammit.

The cat is therapy herself.

I go to church too. I agree with these people philosophically (UU), but mostly I’m there to sing.

What makes you burn, what makes you sing in the shower? what causes your heart to flow freely through your hands? I know what I want to do. I just need out of the glass box, to learn to get through new (and old) disabilities, to be able to do what I want to do (christ, I can only read for ten minutes a week right now)

 

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